Thursday, July 26

parcel, parcel, wherefore art thou parcel?

I bought a new part for the horse trailer (well new-to-me anyway)
and yes, of COURSE I bought it on eBay

The seller emailed to say twould be delivered by City Link
the next day
so I waited
and waited
and. . .
well you get the picture, I waited a bit more
and then I phoned
and waited
and waited
and. . .
well you get the picture, I waited a bit more

 Hayley, who had the voice of an angel
(I'd been waiting on the line so long she could've BEEN an angel)
 agreed with me that it was overdue
in fact she told me that it was undeliverable
the driver had been unable to find our address
the local A-Z map book

As you know we live in a rural area
commonly known as "the countryside"
in a rural county commonly known as Dorset.
And City Link send their drivers to this area
armed with an A-Z MAP BOOK???

Errrr excuse me,
but although I don't have one
aren't sat nav systems quite commonplace now
or have City Link embraced the Luddite system instead?

So this morning, armed with passport ID and 2 utility bills
I made the 90 minute round-trip to the depot
to collect said parcel

With great relish the gentleman behind the counter
warmly dressed in flouro overalls and a knitted beanie
(it was in the 20s by 10 a.m)
showed me that we weren't in the A-Z map book

No, I said, indeed we're not

Where do you live then?

In the middle of a field I said

A field?
A field?
A field. . .like with grass 'n' stuff?

Yes, that type of field

With animals? Sheep? Cows?

No, no animals at the moment

An empty field then?
Yes, an empty field
Apart from the grass 'n' stuff?
Yes, an empty field apart from the grass and stuff- and some trees
Oh grass' n'stuff and TREES!!

D'you know he said, shaking his head in disbelief,
I've never met anyone before who lives in a field
I'd find it very strange

Well, I said
I'd find it very strange having neighbours either side
and opposite and behind

How do people get to you?

Well, I said
normally they open the gate and drive up the drive
or if they're feeling energetic
they've been known to park by the gate
and walk up the drive!

And why are you actually IN this field?  he said

Well, I said
I guess when they built the house that was where they wanted to put it

When was that? He said
1879 I said

After all this time I'm surprised you're not in the A-Z he said
but no wonder you didn't get your parcel
we don't usually deliver to fields. . .

Do you think maybe its because we're unused to the hot weather??


Susan T said...

Ha Ha sorry I should be sympathetic, there is nothing that irritates me more than waiting for someone, parcels, workmen etc. Living in a field must have it's upside, this isn't one of them.

helen tilston said...

What an amusing story. Following all that communication I still think the man in the beanie is no wiser!

Hee he
Helen x

Sue said...

Oh I've had this conversation soooooo many times.

You either have to laugh it off or go back and lie sobbing quietly in the corner of your field.

Sue xx

Ivy Black said...

If you didn't laugh, you's cry!!
I'd like to live in a field.

Jee said...

we don't live in a field but we frequently get told drivers can't find us because our close doesn't come up with the postcode! They might do better with an A - Z .

Oooh Betty said...

Unbelievable but just as equally believable.
A-Z hey, thought they went out with the yellow pages!
Very funny :)
Emma (Oooh Betty) x

lettice leaf said...

We live smack bang in the middle (ish) of our village. End terrace of three 300 year old cottages.

Strange to say nobody knows we're there.

We are not overlooked; well to be honest our neighbour could look out of his window and peep, however he's a recluse. We respect him creeping around and he does the same for our funny little foibles.

A happy place especially if you're on the run.

Our ancient hedge is growing like Jack's bean and the views of the Weald are posivitely panoramic. Just said to hubs

'Are our views 380 degrees?'

He replied "If they were we'd have gone a comple circle and would have been looking up our chuff!'

My denseness on occasions worries me!


Sherri B. said...

How long have they been in business?!!!! That is unbeleivable...And why no note to let you know to come and claim it? Wow!


Fading Grace said...

I have tears running down my face!! laughing ones,... poor guy he might never get over the whole thing! Having been to your house, which is indeed in a field, having said that, I found it, and I am not a delivery person, and I do tend to get lost quite this not afterall their job to find properties and deliver parcels!? what is the world coming too I wonder?

OhSoVintage said...

Well I've started the day with a laugh now, thankyou! Priceless! We have a road sign near us which says 'No through road. Ignore satnav'!
Hope you are having a lovely weekend.
Ruth x

Lynn Proctor said...

i am imagining "little house on the prairie" :)

Kim said...

this post cracks me up!

Mimi and Tilly said...

I don't live in a field but I do live along a little path that runs to the side of the road my address corresponds with. It's llovely, lots of trees, no traffic front or back, but pretty visible from the little cul-de-sac nearby. The number of times I've had phone calls saying "What number are you at?" "38" "There is no 38, it stops at 34." "No, it doesn't we're on the little path to the side of the road, can you see it?" "No". Then I open my door and wave like a loon to the befuddled person standing a few feet from my front door on their phone. 90 mins there and back to pick up a parcel would have me weeping. Especially when confronted with a confused man in a beanie in charge of proceedings. There's just no need. Em ♥

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